Are you an eclectic liver?

Definition: To live eclectically by consciously pursuing a variety of new and different experiences.
antonym-me staying here for the rest of my life
synonym- pretty much anything else.

Ok, here is what I’m talking about. There is a HUGE part of me that needs the security of stability and close meaningful relationships. Then there is this completely other side of me that needs to live my life free of attachment and dependancy.

Who do I succumb to? Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde? And which is Jekyll and which is Hyde.

FACT, I am my mother’s daughter
FACT, I feel stuck and stifled
FACT, Tomorrow is free coke product wednesday at firehouse.

When I switched schools in elementary I tried hard to fit in. I made friends, but there was always this stigma of being, “The New Girl” I’ve played the role a lot. People are fascinated at first but the intial charm wears off and usually I have a hard time convincing people it doesn’t matter that we haven’t been friends since we started kindergarten.

FACT, I have a good idea what my next move will be.

It’s a blessing and a curse. I either feel like an outsider, or I feel totally independant and capable to act on my own.


7 thoughts on “Are you an eclectic liver?

  1. rinikiti

    What’s worse than being the new girl and not having people friendship you? Having lived there your entire life and not having people friendship you. Changing friend groups always was more difficult that creating them for me.

  2. Bloodypaindeath

    I wish I had some kind of wisdom to offer you here, but I find myself lost on the subject. I’ve been an independent person for most of my life and I’ve been in some really terrible relationships, so the path should seem clear to me. Maybe I am just a masochist though. I look at people who have hurt me in the past and see how happy they are now because they have someone, and I wonder why I had to be the one to end up alone. So I try and look for happiness in my relationships with my friends, but it seems really hit or miss. Although, I’m not really sure what I’m ranting about anymore, but if it’s any comfort, you seem like a pretty wonderful person. It’s too bad we can’t hang out more.You should drink lots of Coke though. Coke is really really good.

  3. Bloodypaindeath

    I guess it is probably healthier for you but I prefer the regular stuff. So when I get a kidney stone you can have a good laugh and drink your diet coke.Also, you should come to see Imogen Heap next Friday. It will be a blaaaaast.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s